Working Couples and Stress

Post Date: March 22nd, 2011

 

What 3 Things Men Can Do To Alleviate the Situation.

For thousands of years, men acted as the providers while women took on the role of the nurturers. Men went to work, while women took on the tasks of taking care of the home and children. Today everything is completely different and couples face a new challenge: balancing both women and men in the workplace.The woman spends most of her day at work, but when she comes home she has housework and children to tend to—resulting in a lot of pressure to take on all of the responsibilities. Women have a “never ending to-do list” and so when she finds her husband coming home after a long day of work to come home and sit on the couch to stare blankly at the TV while she has so many responsibilities to do, a lot of resentment can build up.

Experts say, there are three elements that men need to do to help achieve this balance between work and home—and there’s actually quite a lot of science behind it. When women are stressed out, they cannot burn fat, which the body uses for energy and fuel. To feel less stressed, women need an abundant supply of the hormone oxytocin. Men, because of their bodies being made up of more muscle, do not have this; instead they need testosterone, which they can build up by resting and relaxing. To help couples balance work and their relationship more effectively, both people need the things that stimulate their hormones and help them achieve more with less stress.

Here are three things men can do to promote oxytocin production to reduce stress in a woman’s life so they can have more time to relax:

OFFER TO HELP: Women often feel as if they have to do everything by themselves. When you offer to help, this reduces that pressure, and she can feel as if you are her back-up system and support. This helps her oxytocin levels rise, and she feels less stress and gains more energy in order to do all the things she needs to do.

DISPLAY AFFECTION: Another way to stimulate oxytocin is through displaying affection. Hug her every chance you get— in the morning, when you leave each other, before bed. Men think if she wants a hug, she can come get one—but this does not stimulate the hormone. A woman hugging a man does not cause the man to feel more relaxed, because men do not need oxytocin; they need testosterone to relax. When you display affection to a woman, it can help her relax and gain more energy.

COMMUNICATE: Another thing that stimulates oxytocin is communication. Showing interest, asking questions, trying to understand a problem rather than solve it can all help. Men often try to solve problems as quickly as possible and then take a nap because of their testosterone—but it doesn’t work this way for women. Often, the best thing for men to do is just listen, and because her hormones are rising, she’ll feel more energy and feel better about the situation. The answer to helping couples balance this evolving role of work and relationships all comes down to understanding the science behind managing stress. Once couples can reduce the amount of stress in their lives, they then have the energy to come up with a system that works effectively for them both.

 


 

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Anisa’s Bio
Anisa Hassan is an award-winning entrepreneur and an internationally certified trainer, speaker and coach of the John Maxwell Group – a world renowned expert in leadership. Anisa specializes in topics relating to business and professional management. Her vast knowledge and experience in managing interpersonal relations make her presentations lively, impactful and insightful. Currently, Anisa engages management and leadership audiences through her public and corporate workshops all across ASEAN.
 
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